currently is 5.08, very moody.... whole body seems out of my control and feeling so tired...... now outside is raining and my heart is crying just like the rain......... this lately happen so much things to me, love.......works........family........ everything in my life seems to be unwell........ i know that this is just a test from the god...... i know that i can make it through, the real me is very tough and unbeatable, i wish that i can gain back my real me because i lost myself since last break up with the person who i thought was so important in my life.
Even now i always smiling infront of my friends, but actually i am crying inside deep in my heart, i always asking myself why i was born in this world??
i actually thinking that if my parent weren't brought me to this world...... will it be more good to me?? at least i wont suffer from current troubles that affecting my life!!
actually i am very selfish and stupid to think like that, i know my parents love me very very much, so i would not blame them for what they did and very grateful that they brought me to this world and i meet so many wonderful people in my life.
blaming or sinking inside sadness isn't make me stronger or mature instead of keep on falling down to failure life..... i hope that i can make it through this time
i starting to regain myself back, even just a little, but i know that myself is starting conscious and wake from the nightmare and prepare for anything that comes to me
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